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I will also give the Play Therapy based alternative with a short explanation of why it is more effective.

Kids hear the word “no” far too frequently (Read more about that here).

” This gives the child respect and responsibility for their actions.

I can’t tell you the number of times I hear that phrase when around other parents, even though it is highly ineffective.

If a child gets hurt because they were doing something dangerous or inappropriate, they already learned their lesson.

Train yourself to explain the reason behind your statement.

“That is not safe” or “Your skin is not for coloring on” is specific and helps them learn why things are off limits, rather than just that they are.

First, you are threatening a child, which makes them fearful of you.

Second, the threat is usually not something that is feasible to do (we are going home, you are going straight to bed, you don’t get dinner, you are grounded for a week, etc.) What we say in frustration is not only impractical but easily forgettable. You can train yourself to be clear and concise, using choices.


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