The main question I asked myself was, 'Would life without my husband be better?' I've never doubted my decision and am a lot happier now."7. Separation can give couples a taste for what divorce would be like—and, in some cases, scare them into working things out, says Andreani.Pamela Williams Kelly, a lawyer in Memphis, TN, who separated from her abusive husband when her children were young, didn't realize how much her strained marriage had affected her six-year-old son until her separation."My son was angry at me and raised his hand to hit me."Separation made me realize that I wanted my husband and family and I was willing to do whatever it took to make it work," she says.Now married 16 years ("and counting," she says), she and her husband were able to move past their issues."If you have a bonus-driven job, consider starting an action for divorce to set a cut-off date for finances," suggests Newman.
"It's hard to turn back once you start down the divorce road," says Newman.8. While a separation can give kids false hope of their parents reuniting or make the transition back to being a united family difficult, a trial period before divorce can convince you that splitting is best.The single parent dilemma is felt the hardest by the children, and as a product of such a household I am lucky enough to have this insight in my dating life.Many guys just don’t know how to deal with a child that isn’t theirs and it becomes immediately evident to the child, even when the mom is disillusioned into thinking that the guy is perfect.Guys this is hard if you aren’t a lover of children; I cannot stress this any harder; if kids annoy you, or if they get in the way for you, then stick to women who lack kids.If you do love kids, or are tolerant of kids in a friendly way, then you must realize that dating a woman with a child is like dating two people.I knew he saw something I never wanted him to see and my marriage was over," she says."My children's happiness and welfare superseded any lingering feelings I had for their father and economic worries."9. Splitting will certainly affect your income—especially if you or your spouse depends on each other financially.Here, real women and divorce experts share which questions to ask yourself before you call it quits for good. It gives the reluctant party time to adjust to no longer being married, which may smooth the in-court process.It goes more quickly and amicably when both parties are ready to divorce.2. If you aren't completely sure, consider separation, advises Cari Andreani from Jacksonville, FL.You may need to run some sort of background check or something to know what kind of temperament the guy has.A suave, zen-like guy who can hold in his inner lion is great but if you have a temper tantrum throwing lunatic around your baby, you need to drop him like a bad habit.